There are some days when no matter what you do, things just don’t go according to plan. There are days when balance is not even a possibility; you are just hanging on for dear life trying to survive the hectic day. I’ve been having quite a few of those topsy-turvy, “what in the world am I doing?” days lately where I am questioning the directions that my life is moving in. Some days it feels impossible to keep it up for much longer.
But I’ve learned that balance, as much as it’s sought after, isn’t always a day, or even a moment, when everything balances out. Sometimes balance is having one fantastic day to make up for a week of sucky ones. If you do happen to get things in balance for a little while, then you lose your footing; the whole thing goes flying up into the air, and you have to decide what to catch.
I’m finding myself growing significantly as a person while dealing with some frustrating situations. I have become a bit more assertive, I have gotten a promotion and raise, I am more serious about paying things on time, and I’m going to the gym, all while dealing with the adjustment to my position, learning to prioritize my daily tasks, trying to figure out where my relationship is going and what to do about it, get deeper into my faith and closer to God, help my aunt plan a family reunion, pull off an education program, and be a good daughter. There are areas in which I’m doing well, but it’s still a struggle.
The point is, this is balance for me right now. The good outweighs the bad, and the bad are merely challenges to conquer to move me to a higher quantity of good. The good is keeping me encouraged, and the bad is keeping me growing. Things that aren’t growing are dead. I want to grow better, stronger, closer, more authentic.
So at this point in my life, balance is being able to enjoy my accomplishments and be content with my life, while still challenging myself to grow more and be more, while knowing I’m not the one who’s ultimately in control, and learning to surrender when necessary.
What’s balance to you at this point in your life?