The Real Question: Dinnertime Conversations Part II

Chicago Theater

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As I sat frozen at the table after my aunt Tippy’s question, it dawned on me that I hadn’t been asked that question by anyone. It seemed, looking back on it, that most people just assumed they knew the answer, and the answer was in the negative. After all, some of the assumptions they’d made and the questions they’d asked suggested that they thought questions of my virginity were a foregone conclusion.

Well, that’s not completely true. When MensHealth first came to visit me in Florida (he was in Chicago at the time), he went to church with me. One of the church’s elders asked me and him where he was staying after church. This was upon first meeting him. When I visited in Chicago, he asked me where I’d stayed. So, nearly three years ago, someone else was concerned with my virginity.

As I said in the previous post, I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing that no one has asked, that everyone seems to assume that I’m not. I say that seem to assume I’m not because how else could I possibly be thought to be pregnant? I think a lot of the people at church think that I’m fornicating and need to “get right,” which is why they are always encouraging me to get married.

What do you say to people who ask inappropriate questions, or ask questions at inappropriate times? How do you tell people politely to mind their own business?

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2 Responses to The Real Question: Dinnertime Conversations Part II

  1. Catherine says:

    This is pretty immature, but it has worked for me in the past… sometimes I just pretend I don’t hear them. I begin a conversation with someone else. As though the question never even happened. People usually get the point after that! Sorry you had to deal with this.

    • 2blu2btru says:

      LOL, I’ve done a bit of that myself. If someone asks me when I’m getting married as soon as I see them, I sometimes say, “Well hello to you, too! How are you?” I guess I’m trying to make them realize what actual POLITE conversations start off with or sound like. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t. Thanks for the advice. When in doubt, change the subject!

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