Maybe May May Be My Month

In case you’re wondering where I’ve been and why I haven’t had anything personal to say since returning from my social networking sabbatical, I’ve been writing. Since the writing has been personal in nature, summoning up something for this particular blog has been a lot harder than expected. I forgot how hard it is to crawl out of the past when you’ve been delving deeper into it to bring this book out into the now.

Speaking of the book, I have the number of someone to call about my book proposal and how to go about the publishing process. I have never spoken to this person before, ever, and this person has never heard of me. I feel like I’m about to make a cold call for a telemarketing company, but I told myself that I would be more aggressive in marketing myself. I really should stop telling God I’m going to do things like step out on faith; He is that friend that always looks you in the eye and tells you to stop talking and do it, then, if you’re going to do it.

I’ll tell you one thing I haven’t been worried about lately–my relationship. I know how some of you feel about the so-called ultimatum, but let me tell you, I’ve never felt so free to just be. I am not spending so much time trying to predict what’s going to happen or feeling like we aren’t on the same page or feeling like I should probably tweak this or fix that and maybe things will be more like I want them to be. I have unblocked myself. I prayed about what to do, I did what I felt was right, and I am letting God handle the rest. It’s amazing what I’ve freed myself up to do when I’m not on ring watch or emotionally constipated by things I wanted to say but just couldn’t seem to get out.

I’m still waiting on the graphic designer to get back to me with some ideas for my logo, but my brain is still turning over ideas for my future website. I can’t wait to start bringing some of this brainstorming to fruition! There are so many people out there who are doing the same type of website and writing in the same genres, but I truly believe I have something to add to the arena, and I’m not stopping yet.

It has taken me since the first of May to right this, and as I type, the fifth is in its infancy. I’ve been so busy with work and trying to get my apartment into shape that I haven’t had as much time as I would like to devote to a bit of introspection. We had a meditation teacher in from a local yoga studio to give us some beginner’s techniques, and I have to say, I really got something out of it. Finding that quiet space where your mind clears and you can finally focus in on one thing and really see it is amazing. It was like how I felt during my social media fast magnified 10x.

I’ve also started a journal challenge, writing to God and spending time with him each day. It’s in a paper journal and isn’t for sharing, but it’s really been eye opening–and I’m only on day 3.

I hope all of you are doing well. Leave me a comment and let me know.

God bless.

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